Read Between The Lines
by Devine-Odyssey
Summary: Because sometimes it takes a closer look to realise what you knew all along. HarryxDraco  Oneshot.


**Read Between ****The**** Lines**

AN: This piece was actually thought up whilst I was sat drinking a glass of blossom hill with my best friend. I must admit to giving her an awful start when I suddenly jumped up and started going on about needing a pad and paper...(she doesn't have a computer at her house)...so half delirious on wine this little plot bunny was born. I hope that you enjoy it.

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_I thought that you__ loved me the way I was, didn't want me__ change...wasn't that what you told me when we started this?_

_You were so god damn perfect all of the time; sometimes I'd wonder what the hell you saw in me. I'm not perfect. I'm probably as far from perfect as it gets, but I'd always thought that I could at least make you happy...guess it just goes to show how deluded you become when you're utterly and totally in love._

_I never really understood why you used to close your eyes all the time when we were making love. I used to think that it was because you were so caught up in the passion, three years on I__ now__ know better. It wasn't me that you were picturing beneath you...it was someone else._

_Funny how when I realised it that the thought didn't hurt m__e as much as I thought it would, I guess sometimes the knowing is finally a relief._

_What hurt me most of all was when I found out who it was, someone who was as far a cry from myself as you could get. He belonged in your world of sophistication, was as high class as you were. He was gorgeous and I was passively good looking, he was refined whereas I was totally plebeian in comparison. I guess you realised that you couldn't have the sun so you took the moon instead._

_I was a mess afterwards; I tried so hard to be something that I knew I could __never be. I was a near extinguished__ candle burning softly next to a roaring flame, but I had to try. I smiled when it was expected of me, laughed in the places that seemed appropriate and nobody could tell that the smiles never quite reached my eyes. I guess I even managed to fool you in the end._

_Who was I kidding? I was losing myself in this pretence that I had started, I fell into your world of high society and inside my mind was slowly falling apart. _

_Then I saw you together, saw him lean in and whisper something into your ear and I knew that I couldn't pretend any more. I could lie to myself until I nearly believed the words but in the end I was messing around with my own emotions, making myself into the type of person that I had always despised._

_You have no idea how hard it was for me do you? I was the willing body beneath you because the body that you wanted to be there belonged to someone else; I guess that's how it works in the high class...everyone seems to be getting fucked over for the sake of someone else. I thought that I could take it, thought that I could smile and carry on with my heart slowly breaking before me._

_I'm not strong; people seem to get it all confused. I have power, of that there can be no doubt. I can command magic in ways that most wizards can't, I can bend things to my will, yet in this I am truly powerless. For all the magical strength I have, I find that my emotional strength has been completely exhausted._

_I guess in the end I realised that the end was inevitable; I mean what was the point of carrying on the farce...you're in love with someone else and I can't cling to a beautiful dream for the rest of my life. My life is my own and I refuse to live it by someone else's needs any more...you just needed a distraction from your obsession and I can't be that for you anymore. _

_I can't pretend any more, I can't smile and play happy when I feel as though my world is slowly shattering about me._

_I love you, never a truer word has been written down for you to__ read. In all the lies that have been spoken, my feelings are__ the one constant truth, I love you more than I will ever love anything in this life...but you must understand that I couldn't try and compete with perfection. I was losing myself whilst I tried and I think it's time I was just true to who I am, to just be me._

_Thank you for the memories, but now it's time I stood up and took my place in the world without you at my side. Maybe my giving you back your freedom is truly the only gift I could give you of use, you'd have never walked away. You'd have lived your life in perfect misery with me in your bed and him in your heart...call it selfish if you will but I won't be torn any more, I won't be the substitute for your sun._

_The moon has a glow just as bright and although it pales in comparison I'm sure someone somewhere will find it just as beautiful._

_Goodbye love, be happy_

Harry paused in the perusal of his letter; his eyes had long since gone gritty from fighting with his tears.

He recalled with perfect clarity how he had felt when he'd begun to write the letter, how he could picture his blonde lover laughing softly with none other than Blaise Zabini. Ron had tried to tell him of course _'getting involved with Malfoy is asking for trouble mate' _but Harry had scoffed at the warning. Draco was everything he'd ever wanted in a boyfriend, funny, smart, charming and so utterly gorgeous.

A shame such perks came coupled with deceptiveness.

For three years he had been Draco Malfoy's lover, had given himself mind, heart, body and soul to the blonde in a way he doubted he ever would with anyone else. Then the anonymous tip off had come and Harry's shining happy world had crashed to splinters about his feet.

At first he'd thought his paranoia was unwarranted, Draco had done nothing to cause a feeling of distrust. But when Harry observed the way his lover acted around his 'best friend' there had been an underlining chemistry between them that could not be ignored. The way their touches would linger on the other longer than what was necessary, the way they would share intimate whispers and subtle amusement at what always seemed to be a private joke.

The final blow had come when Harry had been at the last Ministry party; he'd gone outside to get some air. Draco had been missing for an hour or so and Harry had been left to fend for himself against the vultures that were the media. Glad for an escape he'd hurried out into the secluded gardens with a speed that would have astonished anyone who witnessed it.

His hurried steps however had been stilled at the embracing couple at the end of the footpath, Draco comfortably entwined within Blaise's strong arms and his head resting on his shoulders, Blaise's strong fingers treading through Draco's silky hair in slow soothing strokes. A look of contentment had been on his face as he whispered words that Harry could not hear through the numbing silence that had suddenly deafened him.

He recalled how he had choked back a sob and fled from the scene, his heart clenched painfully in his chest as his mind scathingly commented how well they fitted against each other. How Blaise was all the things Harry was not, how the ex Slytherin was worthy of Draco's love in ways that Harry himself never would be.

The sound of the door slamming instantly pulled Harry from his thoughts, whirling he froze as Draco entered the room. The blonde had obviously noted the packed belongings that Harry had moved to near the front door of the house they shared, he looked livid as his stormy gray eyes raked Harry from head to toe.

Harry for his part stood shaking under the vicious scrutiny; he watched in helpless confusion as an un-definable look swept across Draco's gaze and then the blonde was striding towards him, his eyes fixed on the parchment that Harry had carelessly left lying openly on the desk. Before Harry could even move to hide it, his lover had the parchment in his hand his eyes frantically reading the lines that were written upon it.

Harry waited silently for a reaction from Draco, tried to look anywhere but at the blonde who seemed to be growing stiffer with every line that he read.

The sound of crumpling paper brought his gaze up, he watched in morbid fascination as Draco crumpled the letter tightly in his fist. His gray eyes burned into his own and he glanced down again at those slender fingers curled so tightly around his heartfelt words. Then Draco opened his hand and nothing but ash fell from between his fingertips.

"I don't understand" Harry whispered softly.

"Fuck you Harry, I come home early to spend my afternoon with you and this is what I find" Draco's voice was an icy calm that belied the fire that raged so fiercely in his gaze. Harry felt totally lost as the taller man stalked towards him, but rather than take out the anger that he imagined to be bubbling through his lovers veins Draco did something that stole the very breath from Harry's lungs.

He fell to his knees and pulled Harry into an embrace, his arms circled tightly about his waist and his cheek pressed into his stomach as though he wanted to fall into him.

"Please don't leave me Harry...you were never ever my moon, surely you must know that you _are _the sun" Draco whispered, his voice was muffled by Harry's clothes but there was no mistaking the desperate words. Harry didn't understand, Blaise was the one that Draco wanted...everyone had said he did.

He wanted to wrench away from the arms that held him, wanted to lash out all the hurt that he had been festering all these years. But hope was relentless in its hold over him; it bit savagely into his heart, demanded that he take heed to its cry and not just abandon everything he had tried to believe in.

"Draco...please...I...I don't understand" Harry stammered, his words came out choked and he winced as Draco's hold tightened even more.

"You have to know Harry, please tell me that you know how I feel about you...how could you even think that there would ever be anybody else for me but you" Draco murmured, he looked up at him and Harry could see a depth of feeling in those beautiful eyes that he had never noticed before...had Draco always looked at him in such a way.

"I close my eyes when we make love, because it's exactly where I want to be. When I close my eyes I can picture everything that you embody, the way you take me in, the way your eyes shine with complete trust and how you let your passion carry you away."

Harry held himself still as Draco began to address everything that he had written in the letter, he was stunned that the blonde remembered every single fear that he had written on paper.

"I've never shared any private joke with Blaise Harry; the only thing we would talk about was how we'd managed to get so lucky. How we'd thought we'd grow old and bitter and so utterly alone, then we'd laugh as we shared moments...moments he'd spent with Neville and moments I had spent with you. Never anything more than that Harry I swear to you on my very name if you'll take that as faith."

"What about the garden?" Harry whispered.

"I'd just told Blaise something very personal, something that I was going to tell you very soon. Blaise and I _are_ close Harry and I have never lied to you about that, it was our way of letting go of our past and laying the last of our ghosts to rest." Draco finally stood then and slowly he reached inside the long black coat he still wore, after a moment he pulled out a small green velvet box.

"I saw this when I was out in Diagon Alley, it reminded me of your eyes and when I looked at it I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you." He snapped the box open and inside sat a perfectly crafted claddagh ring...it was made of gold but the heart was cut from a flawless emerald. A small glint of blue fire could be seen within the green depth and Harry felt his breath still in his throat.

"I never realised that you felt so unsure of my feelings to you Harry, I know that I can be cold sometimes but I swear to you that I love you with everything that I have in me."

A single teardrop made its way from beneath Harry's lashes and before he knew it he was crying in earnest. Tears of relief and happiness fell in silent trails down his face and he let them come, ridding himself of his self doubts and his own stupidity.

"Oh Draco, I'm so sorry...I don't know how I could have gotten it so wrong. I love you; I want to spend the rest of my life with you...I'm sorry" and then he couldn't speak as Draco held him in his arms and kisses away any doubt that was left in his heart.

It was testament that sometimes love truly did work in mysterious ways or that fate always stepped in before things got so bad. It was perhaps an acknowledgement that he had been right to follow his heart when it had led him to Draco, that his friends warnings had really been ungrounded.

But more than anything else, it was about a partnership that would last.

And as Harry wound his arms about his lovers neck, as the blonde deepened the kiss until he was breathless with wonder and passion. As they laughed with abandon as they went to get Harry's belongings and restore them to their rightful place in the home that belonged to them, something remained unnoticed on the ground.

A small pile of ash, the words of the letter having been read, understood and the lesson learned.

Because sometimes it wasn't about what was written...but about reading between the lines.

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Only short and probably not my best since I was quite inebriated when I wrote it, but out of fondness for my friend I decided to put it up anyway. It also helped me to de-stress, I've had far too much work going on at the moment so sitting and writing old school with a pen and pad when I had a few minutes was a sense of refreshment. Computers can become so tedious when you have to use one every day of the week, but needs must and I have managed to have some away from computer time now. Well thanks for the stop by Ciao for now -X- 


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